Most of the articles I read come from Christian bloggers, usually women, documenting their lives and discoveries. I so appreciate their vulnerability and authenticity and I am heartbroken by how much shame and unworthiness I see in their posts. I struggle to lovingly accept that these women (and men) believe a certain way and they are allowed to think differently than I because I see how toxic these ideas are and I want everyone to know the truth. I have experienced freedom through my faith, not discovered I can’t wear yoga pants in public without “causing a man to stumble” or feel the need to apologize to a future spouse for my past actions. My main problem with these usually clickbait posts is how people justify shame through religion. Religions are supposed to inspire hope, churches are supposed to act as support groups and yet I am often disappointed by how women are blamed for a man’s lack of self-control or how churches have no tolerance for anyone part of the LGBTQ community.
We are all God’s children. God does not want her children shackled to shame or forced to obey rule after rule. God wants us to grow, learn, have fun and love others, least that’s my interpretation of the Bible. I do not believe God expects me to apologize to my future spouse for consensual acts of physical intimacy, and she certainly does not expect me to apologize for being sexually abused as a child. God cares less about what I wear but how I show kindness to people around me, especially people who are different than I am. People who practice a different faith, or no faith at all, do not lack human dignity or believe in murdering all Christians. I am shocked to see what uninformed people share on Facebook, condemning all Muslims, the gays (like an entire group of people with this identity all act and feel the same way), and short dresses. A plethora of people get up in arms over the legalization of same sex marriage but not over the brutality and violence many LGBTQ community members endure. God cares more about the wellbeing of her children than a law that does not even force clergy to marry queer people.
I believe in a radical love that transcends all understanding. And I don’t for a second pretend to know everything but I do know the top two commandments: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:30-31. People are allowed to believe in “right-winged” or “left-winged” theology, but what I will not tolerate is the limiting of humans through shame, manipulation and abuse. I practice Christianity because all people deserve equal respect, equal opportunity and love. I practice feminism because it also aligns with my reasons to be a Christian. Not all Muslims, not all members of the LGBTQ community, and not all Christians practice bigotry, hate and violence. Actually in my experience, most people are not bigots until you involve conservative religious circles. The more I research and listen, the better better I understand and see the ramifications sexism, homophobia, islamophobia and other phobias have on people, the better I can better I can love, stripping away my own biases and prejudices.
Biblically, I can only judge fellow Christians, and that is if I have a close relationship to that Christian. 1st Corinthians 5:12-13 states: “For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Is it not those inside the church whom you are to judge? God judges those outside.” And if you take historical connotations into consideration, along with translation errors, I’ve discovered the Bible to be a much more open place than Sunday school taught. It all boils down to learning to love God, others and yourself better. To reiterate, this post isn’t to shame people for posting on their personal blogs their convictions, but to reaffirm my heartbreak in injustices of all sizes. Religions should not focus on lists of rules instead of grace, and violence against another person for any reason deserves more of an out powering of anger and support than rallies against laws that do not in any way affect one’s beliefs. Love God, love others, love yourself, or skip the first one or make it plural. You do you, as long as you don’t deny any other person their basic human rights.