I’ve been radio silent on the blog for an exciting reason- I had several legit reasons to not go to church for several weeks! When I mentioned one of my reasons to dad, he made a comment implying I wasn’t expected to go at all! I didn’t ask any clarifying questions- didn’t want to push my luck. I will be visiting a Buddhist Temple for a homework assignment next week but let me give you a recap since my last post. Fall semester started up and I’m in the swing of my new schedule. I also picked up a bunch of extra hours at other branches. The anxiety of driving and parking at new places and trying to fit in at new branches and acclimate to how they run things is a little much, but it slowly speeds up my loan payoff timeline. It’s a big enough motivator to build up my driving confidence! I plan on job hunting starting December, so it’s also practice for when I’ll be working fulltime and in school fulltime…
I’m kinda obsessed with the idea of that movie Click. It’s a low-quality film, but the protagonist has a remote that skips time. I would love to skip to graduation. Or at least to next Thursday. My first work review is on Wednesday and I’m feeling nervous. I know there are areas I need to work on, that comes with being in any position for just a few months. But hearing them from someone else crushes me, no matter how kind and wonderful my boss is. The reality that I disappoint other people is so overwhelming, especially hearing it from them. I’ve been reading about the enneagram and I am such a One! I love my job, mostly because I work with phenomenal people. I’m so lucky. Trying to focus on that instead of the never-endingness of school. Oh, my weekly study sessions with my coworker and grad school buddy start back up tomorrow!
Another nervous thing? Mom is visiting grandma next week. I’m worried the family drama will get stoked up and I will get dragged into more bullshit. I apologized, for lots of shit that I didn’t even do. And I feel so bad for mom, she’s gonna be dragged into this, she feels bad when she doesn’t need to. I would use that time-hopping remote to skip to the end of the month and miss out on all the possible nonsense that is family drama.
I’d love to call sometime soon <3
-Rachel